Tagged: NO

Saying “NO” is a Complete Sentence

Posted by on in Mind/Body, self care 2 comments

No is a complete sentence.

We all have them; people that drive us to mentally figure out “How to Get Away with Murder“. They ask you to do something that you clearly don’t want to do, so you mutter, “No.” That clearly doesn’t deter them. They continue on, and very much like a child in the cereal aisle tormenting a tired parent on a shopping trip, they wear you down, until you just say yes, to get them as far away from you as possible.

Saying “NO” is a Complete Sentence

Boundaries are a beautiful thing. It gives you a line to where you can set them, and folks can see where they can push you- but no further. Boundaries are for you to set, forward or back, but it’s your job to set them. To some, they are easy to set; for the rest of us, setting boundaries takes some practice. Here are a few tips that work for me –

  1. Making sure your head is in agreement with your NO – Nodding your head while saying NO gives
    Jessica Williams saying NO

    Make sure that your head aligns with you saying NO. You would be amazed at how often you nod saying NO.

    the person asking an opportunity to wear you down. It may sound crazy, but see how you look when you say ‘no’. You’d be surprised how you may have been giving mixed signals unconsciously.

  2. Make sure your body isn’t betraying you – Your posture dictates when people can get away with foolishness. If you are standing up straight, and look like you are about a sense of purpose, it is less likely that people will bug you. If you look like the last kid picked for dodgeball, your posture is saying it’s a good time to get away with something inane.
  3. Find more than one way to say it – the moment you are asked, depending on the situation, screaming at the top of your lungs may not be the most appropriate way to answer the question. Find a different way to say it, and apply that way to the appropriate situation.

Remember – 1) it takes practice to maintain boundaries and 2) people will constantly try to move your boundaries to fit their agenda. Saying NO to someone or a situation is essentially saying YES to you and your own agenda. Self-care is NOT selfish, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

P.S. – I know that this isn’t the complete list on saying NO. What do you do to maintain your boundaries and keep your sanity?

 

 

Just Blog It – 5 things I’ve learned since I’ve turned 40

Posted by on in Uncategorized 4 comments

I tell you- the List Post for me is the most challenging one to do! This post took all day to write, and took on several iterations. Here is the one that finally took-

1- Saying NO by far, is the best diet plan in the world.

2- Your taste preference will change, whether you want it to, or not.

3- In my 30’s, my type of exercise was jumping to a conclusion. Now, I’ll do a 5K. You run (or walk) your race. All you need to do finish.

4- Your hormones will go on strike. If people call you Sybil, don’t take it personally.

5- Before your kids leave home, find something fun for YOU to do.

Body Language, Body Language…

Posted by on in Massage Therapy, Mind/Body, self care, Stretching 0 comment

Body Language, Body Language...

You know it’s coming…it’s almost the end of the day, and you’re looking forward to getting out of the office, and someone comes up to you and asks,

“Can you stay late/ finish the project/ start a new project? OK, thanks!”

You tend to notice that that doesn’t usually happen first thing in the morning, right? People can tell when it’s the best time to ask you for things, because your body is telling them!

When you arrive in the morning, you tend to look alert, shoulders back, head up, eyes alert. People who want to stress you out aren’t coming to mess with you, because they know they can’t get away with it. You’re on to them, and they may get a ‘NO’ right off the bat.

As the day progresses, and you’ve been sitting at that desk all day. You’re tired, you haven’t been stretching, and you are ready to just go home. That’s when General Foolishness wants to strike! Your shoulders are rolled forward, head bowed in near defeat – you are just asking them to give you grief!

Take time throughout the day to stretch, and take a walk to get the blood moving! The stretching will improve your posture, and reduce tension.